The thing is ... I don't know exactly what happens here .... do I run to the edge ? or do I just happen to be there every time ... like it's my destiny .. the girl who will always be on the edge ..
at my age .. after knowing what i know.. i think that we got the word "destiny" all wrong ... like it's a given thing .. something that will never change .. it's all written .. it's all known already ... in egypt here we have this saying ... " what is written on the head will be seen by the eye" so we won't blame ourselves for anything .. so we won't be held responsible for anything .. so nothing is a given .. maybe it was meant to scare us .. from what is coming .. to be obsessed about it .. to live your life waiting to know what your eyes should see or what is written ... people waste money and time and energy on different ways to know the stars .. to know the unknown ... if that's our purpose of living then i think is a very stupid purpose .. like a game .. and i believe in God .. i believe in His greatness .. wisdom .. beauty .. mercy.. and our creation must have this supreme meaning ... it's such a torture to live waiting .. to know .. your future .. even if it's written ... it's not right to sneak up to it and see .. cheating .. an easy way out ... like when you have an exam .you choose not to study ... and you sleep .. watch T.V .. just walk into the exam and cheat the answers .. you'll pass ... but you won't learn anything .. regarding that exam .. you will learn how to cheat without getting caught .. sometimes .. the last lesson .. becomes a purpose on it own .. here you make your choice in life ... so you want to be an honest person .. or a cheater??
so i refuse to believe that being on the edge is my "destiny" because no matter how much i try to know or figure out or try to cheat my own written life ... i will never succeed .. i could never ever know it .. because simply .. I'm not God .. i'm this tiny piece of His light .. who has her own purpose of living .. which is to use my free well.. to make a life ... the fact is .. we shouldn't bare ourselves of what is written .. we shouldn't even consider it .. just figure out what we want .. and make our own choices .. and give everything to make it happen .. if you do all these steps .. you are then allowed to let go .. we are brought up to the wrong definition of destiny .. or the wrong timing to use it ..
so ... do i like being on the egde .. never into a truthful thing till the end .. absolutely not .... does my fears over come everything else i want .. unfortunately .. YES...
at my age .. after knowing what i know.. i think that we got the word "destiny" all wrong ... like it's a given thing .. something that will never change .. it's all written .. it's all known already ... in egypt here we have this saying ... " what is written on the head will be seen by the eye" so we won't blame ourselves for anything .. so we won't be held responsible for anything .. so nothing is a given .. maybe it was meant to scare us .. from what is coming .. to be obsessed about it .. to live your life waiting to know what your eyes should see or what is written ... people waste money and time and energy on different ways to know the stars .. to know the unknown ... if that's our purpose of living then i think is a very stupid purpose .. like a game .. and i believe in God .. i believe in His greatness .. wisdom .. beauty .. mercy.. and our creation must have this supreme meaning ... it's such a torture to live waiting .. to know .. your future .. even if it's written ... it's not right to sneak up to it and see .. cheating .. an easy way out ... like when you have an exam .you choose not to study ... and you sleep .. watch T.V .. just walk into the exam and cheat the answers .. you'll pass ... but you won't learn anything .. regarding that exam .. you will learn how to cheat without getting caught .. sometimes .. the last lesson .. becomes a purpose on it own .. here you make your choice in life ... so you want to be an honest person .. or a cheater??
so i refuse to believe that being on the edge is my "destiny" because no matter how much i try to know or figure out or try to cheat my own written life ... i will never succeed .. i could never ever know it .. because simply .. I'm not God .. i'm this tiny piece of His light .. who has her own purpose of living .. which is to use my free well.. to make a life ... the fact is .. we shouldn't bare ourselves of what is written .. we shouldn't even consider it .. just figure out what we want .. and make our own choices .. and give everything to make it happen .. if you do all these steps .. you are then allowed to let go .. we are brought up to the wrong definition of destiny .. or the wrong timing to use it ..
so ... do i like being on the egde .. never into a truthful thing till the end .. absolutely not .... does my fears over come everything else i want .. unfortunately .. YES...
